Sunday, March 24

Several things I thought about in the course of today:

1. Yes Graham, after Ender's game the books bite the big one. (Except the parrallel novel "Ender's Shadow", it's almost as good as Ender's Game... but then again it almost IS Ender's Game... from Bean's perspective.) And for anyone else who hasn't read Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card you are SERIOUSLY missing out. I haven't heard one person say this was a bad book.

2. I have compiled a some ways for you, if you are bored, to make a Barnes and Noble bookseller (And maybe even Border's booksellers as well) have a bad day, these can either be in person or on the phone.

a) "Hi I'm lookng for a book..." (and then wait for the seller to say something)

b) after the bookseller saying that he can't 1. find the book or 2. it's not in the store say indignantly: "Well! I saw it on your website!"

c) "Hi! I'm looking for a book, but I don't remember the author, or the title of the book... I think it had a yellowish cover and it was on a table towards the front of the store 6-9 months ago."

d) speak very quietly in another language.

e) Lean over the counter to talk to the bookseller.

f) Upon having the bookseller find the book for you thank them profusely and then give them a 20-30 minute lecture on what the book is about and why the author is so great. (NOTE: This works the best if you know for a fact that the bookseller knows nothing about the topic in question, (ex: Talking to the guy who knows a LOT about Science Fiction about why the book "The Wrinkle Cure" is so incredibly wonderful.))

g) Ask one bookseller for some book that you know isn't in the store, act like you don't believe them and then ask the other bookseller right beside them for the same thing.

h) Ask the bookseller to find a book that your "friend" told you about. Make sure to intentionally give the wrong author, and then when they try to correct you SWEAR that they (bookseller) must be wrong because your friend is all knowing.

i) Have the bookseller find you a whole ton of books off of a list, make a big show of being excited to find them all in one place maybe even do example "f" a bit and then make sure to leave the whole entire pile in a place the bookseller will find all of them. (Preferably as far away from the places where the books came from as possible.)

That is my list of things to do to upset a BN bookseller. (Not that those have happened to me or anything... Nooo, never.)

Now as some of you might also know I am part of a team that videotapes meetings for Microsoft. The ONLY reason I have maintained this job is that I get paid 3x's better than BN. But the job is boring beyond all reason. So here is my list of ways to tick off a Microsoft video shooter:
a) Have a meeting.

Thanks and goodnight!



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