Optionally Buzzed

We have been putting up pictures in the new apartment the past few days (and by "we" I mean, not me.) and there is a grand theme in many of the pictures I am in. Hair. I know I've blogged about this at least once (twice, three times) before, but I kind'a wanted to post something of an update about it. The past few months as my hair as inched towards being closer to a few centimeters (mixing my measurements there, sorry Ryan) I have taken the razor and reduced the growth back down to my scalp. And you know what? It's made a HUGE difference on how I see myself when I look in the mirror. I imagine there is some kind of psychological explaination but I boil it down to the fact that this look is now my choice in haircuts instead of long, curley hair that hasn't happened in... Ummm... Almost five years now. So when I look in the mirror and see a cleanly buzzed head I enjoy the way I look. Yes it might be born of a situation I don't like, but it's also a choice on my behalf.

On a slightly humorous note (and if my dear cousin Jon ever reads this we can "fist bump" or something in understanding.) I have been told since, well, I don't even remember the first time I was told this, but I have been told since I can remember that I would probably go bald pretty early because my maternal grandfather was bald as could be by the time he was in his mid-20's. I was warned that it might be an option that I wouldn't have much/any hair by the time I reached thirty. Well, sadly it's true. The past five years have seen my more head hairless than with hair, and from this point forward I will probably proceed shaved. Funny how some things come to pass, even if no one thought of THIS as a way to make that prophecy true.

Next week I am seeing the doctor again, me guess is that we'll be starting the platelet stimulator, which means so much fun. (not really) At this point the sidemeds to get me back to a place where I can have chemo again are definitely worse than The chemo. I'll enjoy my flu-symptom free life for a few more days.

Also for those of you interested in doing something artistic for the site (see previous entry) I am running something of a contest to design a tattoo with the phrase "it is well with my soul" on it. (aside, I guess if I can't do the tattoo thing (medically) I might just accept them as works of art. I'll do the research though and see what's up. I seriously want to see what you guys can come up with.)

Thanks again for your prayers and support!


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~B.

Ben Morrell

Skype: OCBenMorrell

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