Colorado, my Heart

Rhodochrosite from Alma Colorado. Picture from Academic.ru

Since Houston got a "sorry we missed you" letter I felt it was only appropriate to talk a bit about Colorado. (Part of a series on reminiscing about places we have lived) Where Houston was a place that we felt pulled to for medical reasons, Colorado is where, we feel our hearts called to. We both have companies there, and absolutely love our jobs. I cannot think of a job I would like more than the one I have when I can do it full time. Lisa's job is not only a continual challenge to her, but her employers have become great friends to the both of us and they care deeply for Lisa and I. Both of our companies really have adopted us in some form or another as family of the members of the company. Holidays with them, plenty of food, even staying for weeks at a time while up from Houston. They accepted us, and we happily accepted and became a part of their lives as much as they became a part of ours.

We don't have as many friends in Colorado Springs as we made in Houston, or have have in Seattle, but both of us consider a large part of our lives to be IN Colorado Springs. Though we have lived there less time than the other places we have lived, we have felt called to, and back to, Colorado Springs, both in regards to Lisa's work in architecture, and then to my work doing IT related things for OC. But each calling was different. Houston was medical, and Colorado Springs is vocational. I don't know how long these desires will last with my sickness seeming to deepen and Lisa being in a city where there are more opportunities for Architecture than in Houston, but Colorado Springs is where you will find our hearts and our passions.

I really wish we could have spent the time to swing by Colorado Springs on the way home. But that wasn't in God's plan for us right now. Lord willing (please Lord!) we will be back there to see you all and to continue in our jobs and with the renewed passions or a couple who has been through a real battle.

When I first started at OC the move from Seattle to Colorado Springs seemed crazy. I had been off of chemo/surgery/radiation for less than nine months and here we were facing an interstate move to a place we had only spent a few weeks in our lives. We knew no one and my job offer was the only thing calling us down there. It was my dream job. It was exciting to get away from Seattle with the recent, bloody memories of cancer treatments, and to try and forge a bit of our own path in the world.

We settled into the beautiful world of Colorado Springs as we hunted for a church, made friends, found a place to live, and tried to settle down into what life might look like there in the Springs. Lisa found a job and they quickly incorporated her into their environment. Then we bought a townhouse and a great giant BBQ smoker combo, and tried out the local fruits, veggies and meats from a local farmers collective. We were enjoying ourselves a lot, and felt like we had been blessed greatly.

Then a few weeks before my parents were to visit us in the fall, I had a routine scheduled checkup and they saw that there were some "enlarged lymph nodes" in my chest area. After a biopsy they told me that yes, the cancer was back, only this time it was higher and closer to much more dangerous places. My oncologist, not messing around, put in a call to MDA and got me setup with one of the foremost experts in this type of cancer. For the first year to nine months or more we traveled back and fourth between Colorado Springs and Houston getting suggestions, and then traveling back to get treatments. It was at those points that we really didn't like Houston.

During the time we were going back and fourth a lot of people from our church, whom we didn't know, and I am not sure I could pick out of a crowd now, helped us with getting me to and from treatments, and making sure that we had food. My co-workers tried to help where they could as well. But despite God coming around us in the form of His body of Christians, the time I was on treatment in COS was a lonely time. It felt very much like the desert the Israelites went through on the way to the promised land. It was something we had to do... but it was a time of quiet and very filled with just Lisa and I.

Our hearts were there in the Springs with what we were doing and what we wanted to do, but perhaps those around us didn't know what to do, how to handle us, or how to reach out. The desert stretched out and when we were asked to join a Phase One Trial at MDA, which required us to be there every week, we jumped into it with both feet and we were living in Houston within a week and a half. We met the Sunday School class in Houston within the week of moving there, and have been in Houston exclusively until just, very, recently.

Despite these fail-backs of Colorado Springs, and ways and means in which they could improve we still feel our hearts pulled there. The passion I have to do what I have been doing there and what I want to be doing there is hot and bright, and aside from the pain of the tumors and the shortness of breath nothing "bothers" me more on a daily basis. My mind has such great ideas and hopes for things that God has put in my head to try and improve missions with technology and helping "ordinary" people get involved with what God is doing around the world. (I can talk about that a lot and love brainstorming on the topic)

We made some close friends in Colorado Springs, but by the very nature of the city (very transient) a lot of our friends themselves moved on to other places in the world where God called them to be. (Thailand, San Antonio, Seattle, Mexico, Spain, African states, the Middle East, and China come to mind) While our hearts are in Colorado Springs and what we have been involved in there a lot of the people who love and care for us have followed God's call to other places... which is ultimately the true goal of the thing that brings passion to what I do.

While we consider Colorado as a place we hope to return to should the Lord heal me, it wasn't really in the "running" for us to land for this point in our lives. Colorado Springs is representative of a hope of what can be done and what still needs to be done. It's about potential and promises fulfilled. I might get to be a part of that, and then I might not get to join in that. The call is entirely my Lord and Father's. I am His to do with as He desires. He knows where I want to be and what I want to be doing, I've told Him... I've asked you to tell Him, and we've all prayed for it. So if that isn't what happens, then God has something far better in it for all of us, as disappointing as that might seem to us right now.

The support from Colorado Springs, and the desire to have us back there is great, and we thank all of you there for that. I want you to know that is our hope to go back. In reflecting on all this, God's leading and directions seem that much more focused. The way He's opened up doors for us. Laid open details before we asked for them, and set the light before our paths before we even thought to ignite the lamp. He is truely a great and amazing God. He brought us safe thus far, and I have faith that no matter what happens between us and this cancer, that He will use it to impact everyone who knows about it, and everyone who will ever hear about it.

Thank you Colorado Springs, OC International, Pulpit Rock Church, and LGA Studios, for being a part of it all, and for being an embodiment of hopes for us. It doesn't mean that it'll happen, but for us Colorado is still out there, and God's promises are renewed every morning, so, maybe someday again, and soon.

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In my last post I mentioned I setup a scheduling tab at the top of my page (Meet w/ Me). You are more than free (Colorado Springs, Houston, or anywhere) to setup Skype/Google Hangout/Phone Call dates to chat with myself, or maybe even Lisa if she's not busy. You can also use the form to setup in-person appointments. As always if you see me on Skype you can feel free to drop me a line and see if I can chat, sometimes I will be able to and sometimes I won't... but if it's scheduled then we will be able to chat. I really want to be available to keep in contact with all of you, near or far. Anything from a quick prayer, to a lengthy conversation is fine by me!

Thank you all.

~B.
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