Thursday, October 13

Slow Burn

Despite the title of this post sounding like some gritty paperback crime novel you might pick up at the airport on your way to Cincinatti on a layover in Philadelphia (you know the type, author's name larger than the title, text superimposed on some large metropolitan area and the title being in shiny gold.) Unfortunately for this blog I don't have a name like Jack Ryan, Sam Spade or Roger Rabbit. I don't even have a slick nick name.

Where was I? Oh yes, Slow Burn. Yesterday at our meeting with my Oncologist he showed us the past few PET scans so we could see how things have been progressing the past six or more months. "You really needed the chemo the work in May." is what he said as he pulled up the scan from back in April. It's pretty clear from the past three scans that this chemo has really been burning away at the cancer. God is indeed working in my body through these drugs and is squeezing the life from these tumors. It's nothing fast acting, or as quick as perhaps you or I would like, but it's been a slow burn. The metabolic rate for the tumors has gone from seven to five to four point eight. The "heat map" coloring on the PET scan is noticeably different between all three scans. (my tumors are getting darker)

It's impossible to tell with these scans how big the tumor is, just where the activity is at. I generally don't look at my scans as I feel like "knowing how bad it is" really doesn't help me have the energy to fight, so I appreciate a retrospective, because it's in the past and I can't do anything about it. I can't do anything about the future either... but it's easier to try when it's ahead of you instead of behind.

It was good yesterday to see those scans, and to take a moment to look back and think about the past six months and where I have been medically. It's like taking the time to look back at my year at New Years and realize how much i have changed. I never really feel much different, but in looking back I realize I am. It's exciting to see the things that God has been doing in and through my life as I stop and think about where He has taken me and what He has done to teach me, protect me, comfort me, humble me, and use me in so many ways and in people's lives.

Please continue to pray for my doctor that he can find something that will work better than the drug I am on now (as it will stop working/ be bad for my heart in the long run) and for my body that it will continue to support the killing of the tumors, and for the mental health of both Lisa and myself.

On another note Lisa and I are moving in a week and a half. And after this mornings hour plus commute to the hospital (one way) I am looking forward to only being on the road five minutes in the future to get here. My advance thanks to everyone who has and will be helping us.



Ben Morrell
Skype: OCBenMorrell

1 comment:

  1. Burn, baby, burn!!! Loved the great report. And we're looking forward to MANY more down the road.


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