Saturday, December 1

Friday night Prayers

As readers will know last night some friends from our church called a prayer session for Lisa and I. People showed up, I think the enemy also tried to influence it, but most importantly our God was there mightily.

Probably upwards of thirty people showed up. (Mathew 18:20) I say that I think the enemy also tried to get in as well/ set back what we were doing because almost as soon as we started I got one of my migraines where I lost all of my sight. The migraine progressed somewhat like normal but it took a back seat to what was going on in the room.

I have never experienced a more heart-felt time of prayer in my life. People were crying, imploring the Lord, reading scripture, sharing stories of healing and the Holy Spirit's guidance of doctors. I was prayed for very deeply, as was Lisa.

It touches me very deeply to think that my friends... even some people I don't know that well. Would show up, and cry out to God to bring me complete healing.

I have a confession to make. Wednesday, I lost hope. In the past when they have said, "you have X amount of time" I have just kind of shrugged it off and said, "I have what time God has given me." Wednesday it went right into my heart and I believed it. I had laid down my sword and was pretty much taking the arrows that were being fired at me. Hope was something that was being strangled beside me as I let myself take the lies and the belief I had this was the end.

This morning is the first time... in I don't know... ever? That I have woken up with praise songs running through my mind. I almost physically felt like I held a sword in my hand. It brings me to tears with shame to think of the things I had believed and given up on my God. Forgive me Lord, my father, for sinking in the pit of despair and thinking that this fight was over and ended before you said it was.

I cry too for the faith that my friends had when I did not. To build a chain together and reach down into that pit and pull me out back into the light. The continue that fight for God, to continue the fight toward HEALING, for God's glory.

This morning I don't know if I am feeling physically stronger... I can't really tell over the overwhelming new spiritual outlook I have this morning. Thanks to my God were first upon my thoughts this morning and I cannot tell you what a difference that is compared to "you're going to be dead in six months" that has greeted me the past few mornings.

Thank you everyone. I hope God chooses to bless me with healing so that I can be a gift and a treasure to God's awesomeness to all of you. That God would make me a beacon of hope, so that when you are in dark places that God can use His reflected light to help rescue you from the pits.

Thank you. Below are the prayer requests gathered last night that I thought I would share:
1. Ben's heart (emotional, spiritual)
2. Ben's physical body (healing from migraines and daily pain due to the tumors as well as complete healing)
3. Their families (that they'd be comforted and know how to be/act during this difficult time, it is hard living so far away)
4. Wisdom/Faith for Ben and Lisa. What they should do with the "news" Ben got last week. Next steps
5. Wisdom for the doctors (that God would take away pride and ego and give insight. Also, some bedside manner wouldn't hurt!)
6. That God would put a hedge of protection around Ben as he sleeps, removing all nightmares. Putting angels to guard his mind.
7. Lisa: That God would give her strength as a caregiver, compassion and emotion at the right times and strength and resolve at the right times. That she could balance and prioritize work, helping Ben, and time for herself, and time with the Lord.
8. Health Insurance- His COBRA expires in April. Pray for wisdom on how to find a new insurance and provision for funds.

[ Prayer request? | Help Us? ]


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