How long?

This past month I really feel like I have been feeling the battle against cancer more than some other months of the past year. When the side effects are hard and heavy and I don't have the mental capacity to think much or to even feel like I COULD be somewhere else it isn't much more than a day-to-day battle. Yet then there is the type of fight I am in now where I get treatment once a week and my mind is relatively clear and I am stuck within a weeks travels from Houston. And most times I can't fly anywhere. I'm ready for some kind of respite, furlough, or sabbatical from cancer treatments.

Though thinking about it, perhaps what I want is some sort of control over what and/or where I am in the world that isn't dictated by life or death. I guess I've been thinking a lot recently about Seattle and the friends and family I have there, and it's not attainable in my current situation.

I'm sorry if I've been complaining a lot recently. I am tired, more weary, from this constant fight. I have a passion and the skills to do a job that I really love and I would 1000 times prefer to be doing that to this, but here I am.

One big advantage to being here in Houston though is that I have had the opportunity to (eat some great BBQ) meet some people I wouldn't have met before. There are some great people in the class we're in at church. Not to mention meeting some fellow co-workers who have had to come to Houston from Spain for treatments at MDA as well. I've been learning a lot from them.

Is a year really so long? Is the lack of mobility away from Houston really that bad? It's ONLY been a year, how about we look at it like that? And the blessing of Houston is that it's the 3rd or 4th largest city in the US, lacking really nothing I could think to do, and within easy driving distance of a lot of interesting things. God has provided housing for us. God has provided some friends, and while we can't get back to the place we call home we are learning to live where we have been moved.

~B.